ARIES: After another Friday night home alone, you want music to match your mood, but Spotify comes up blank for ‘murderous’.
TAURUS: Your Glass is always half empty, proving what a terrible name for a SoHo bar ‘Your Glass’ is.
GEMINI: Never put off what you can do today until tomorrow, as you said yesterday.
CANCER: You return your sausage dog to the SPCA, because the sausages he makes taste revolting.
LEO: You’ve spent years studying the least deadly of the martial arts – tofu.
VIRGO: You’ve always been proud of the fact that no matter what, you’re prepared to stand by your principles. It’s just a shame they’re so utterly insane.
LIBRA: Time to kick the exercise regime into high gear. So sit up in bed when you eat your multipack of Pocky.
SCORPIO: Your heart sinks when you spy the cop you’ve been trying to avoid through your apartment door’s peephole. Well, you married her!
SAGITTARIUS: You’ve been arguing about politics a lot recently. Why not try something slightly more dignified, like fighting in a public toilet over a floating dog end?
CAPRICORN: If your blood is capable of curdling, you may want to cut back on dairy.
AQUARIUS: The humid weather combined with your functional alcoholism mean your work shirts are now highly sought after as a botanical for the production of gin.
PISCES: Don’t hate the player. Hate the game. Unless it’s golf, then hate both.
For more from Sadie go to http://www.sadiekaye.tv and the Miss Adventure site: https://missadventurerthk.com
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