Does lack of sex harm your health?

Nearly 80, I am damn near celibate. Haven’t had sex for months. On rare occasions I will have an erotic dream and wake with with my groin dully aching. The discomfort is soon gone and I get on with another day of not doing very much. Does this bother me? No, you get past the lusting of youth when hormones are jumping around crazily. Just memories now, remembering, for example, the time I went with my first wife, then the girl friend, to Macau* and we rogered ourselves cross-eyed six times in 24 hours. But that was 50 years ago.

A former Cathay Pacific captain friend said to me, “When you get past chasing women all the time, it comes as a relief.” That’s how I feel now, as the clock ticks towards my 80th year. But . . .

Does lack of sex harm your health?

MEDICAL NEWS TODAY: Regular sex results in an improved immune system, reduced blood pressure, lower stress levels, reduced risk of cardiovascular events. However, “when someone does not have sex for months or years, they are unlikely to notice any negative side effects on their health.”

WEB MD: Sex makes your body release hormones, like oxytocin and endorphins, that can help manage stress. Oxytocin helps you sleep. People who have sex often are better at recalling memories. There are signs that sex can help your brain grow neurons and work better. Regular sex will improve communication with your partner and you’ll be happier.

NEWS-MEDICAL: Lack of sex is linked to cancer, heart disease, and generally poor health. Commonly, when people get older, they become asexual, losing interest in and capacity for sex. A survey of men 50 years and older found they have two thirds greater likelihood of  serious illness. Woman have 64 per cent higher risk of ill health if they have sex less often.

HEALTHSHOTS: Dr Sanjay Kumawat (we’re not trying to be funny) lists five side effects of not having sex: 1) Decreased libido. It becomes more challenging to get aroused and feel sexual desire. This can create a vicious circle, the longer the gap persists the more difficult it becomes to regain desire. 2) Erectile dysfunction and performance anxiety. The worst thing for a man is fear he can’t perform. Nothing is better at making sure he remains flaccid. Lack of stimulation affects blood flow to the penis and reduces the ability to achieve erection. 3) Vaginal dryness and painful intercourse. Regular sexual arousal promotes lubrication. Without it vaginal tissues can become dry and inelastic, resulting in pain and even micro-tears during intercourse. 4) Weakened pelvic muscles. Regular sex  strengthens pelvic muscles. Otherwise you may have urinary incontinence, organ collapse and reduced sexual satisfaction. 5) Emotional and  relationship challenges. Lack of sex  can lead to feelings of frustration, dissatisfaction, resentment and eventual breakdown of a relationship.

What do we say? Like Michael Gove, we’ve had enough of “experts”.

Don’t worry, be happy.

* Her name was Ginny. We travelled to Macau on a slow overnight ferry as you did in those days. We had a cabin. Both 22 years old we went at it like rabbits. There was a mirror in front of which we did our frantic performing. Exhausted and satiated, we fell asleep. When  we woke it was daylight and we realised it was not a mirror but a window onto the deck. How many people had watched the kids’ enthusiastic priapic acrobatics?